Squirrel Underpants

Click here to help protect the world from Squirrel Nudity!

SMALL ANIMAL DECENCY is an organization that works to keep animal nudity away from the eyes of innocents. We believe that you don't have to be human to experience shame. We believe that the natural state of all animals is clothed. And finally, we believe that it is up to us to clothe all the animals in nature before our world becomes a cesspool of iniquity.

Ask yourself, is this a zoo or a strip club?

Protect your children!

The world today is a constant assault on our senses. From TV to radio to our email in-boxes we are constantly exposed to the absolute worst our society has to offer. Humans are, of course, the worst offenders but there are no innocents in this descent into swill. All living creatures must take responsibility for the moral education of (human) children.

Enough is enough!

I started this group after deciding enough is enough. My wife and I got rid of the TV, radio and blocked the internet. We even cancelled our subscription to the newspaper and smugly thought we had plugged all the holes that were letting this filth into our home. We gathered our children and went for a walk in the woods to experience the wonder of nature.

Instead of a restful hike admiring the grandeur of the forest, what we experienced was a shocking parade of animal genitalia and tushies. It was as if instead of going to a park we had wandered into an x-rated theater. By the time we left, we were ashamed and our children were forever traumatized.

The worst offender in all of this? The squirrels.

This experience led us to found Small Animal Decency, an organization dedicated to clothing the small animals that city children are constantly exposed to. We have only taken our first tiny baby step toward this goal by manufacturing and selling Squirrel Underpants.

What can you do?

Besides mindful eye-covering and animal avoidance, the best thing you can do is buy our Squirrel Underpants. This is useful for two reasons. One, it will allow you to clothe a squirrel! Two, it helps us fund our movement to eventually clothe all the animals of the world. Right now, Elephant Underpants are just a beautiful dream, but with your financial support, they could be a reality.